Never a Mother's Day went by that my mother was not celebrated in one way or another. As children we proudly wore a red carnation to church to honour our mother and we would save our meager allowance money to find something special for her at the five and dime store (at least we thought cheap perfume, etc was special and imagine she had to actually wear it!). For the 36 years she lived here in Ottawa I never neglected to celebrate her special day and for many of them it helped to ease the feelings of hurt that I experienced as a mother who was forced to give up everything that mattered in my life - it was always important that she have her day and now years after she has passed it still is and always will be her day. There were many times when we did not see eye to eye and especially during my rebellious teenage years but I always respected the fact she was my mother and the only one I would ever have. I do not feel that I was the daughter she wished me to be at least not for many years but before she passed away we were indeed mother and daughter and all the ways it mattered. She could sometimes test the patience of a saint and there were times I had to make some very difficult decisions when she aged and her health was failing - she disowned me every other day but it only lasted until I got home when she would call to say "hello". She was the one person I could talk to openly and sincerely without being judged and when I was going through the most difficult time in my life she showed me how to be a survivor. She knew me better than anyone and even when she was very ill I could not fool her as she could read me like a book and knew exactly how I was feeling. They say that no matter how you feel about your mother you will miss her when she is gone and that is so very true. I was always there for her in good times and in bad but feel that there was more that I could have done and perhaps told her more often how much I loved her. I will never know what it is like to have my own mother/daughter relationship so I cherish those special moments I had with my mother.
So, dear mother on this special day, thank you for being a soft place for me to fall and for loving me unconditionally.
Tuesday, May 09, 2006
Renovations: We talked to our contractor on Monday and were informed that the start date for our kitchen renovations would likely be next Monday but he would get back to us after he confirmed that the cabinets, etc would be delivered on time. He called back today and his first words were "are you sitting down" which is not always a good sign!! Would you believe the cabinets had never been ordered - the manager who we dealt with at the end of March assured us he would place the order right away but he took sick and nobody followed up on the order. On top of this they cannot find any paperwork and we have to go back over to Gatineau to inform them what countertop and hardware we selected and make sure they are aware of any changes we made. Contractor has assured us a rush order was sent in and cabinets would be delivered by 30 May. Hopefully if all goes well and I am no longer overly optomistic they promised to come in after the long weekend to ready the place for the cabinets.
Friday, May 05, 2006
Followed the webcam for the eagles and disappointed there were no babies but they say the eagles might just be too old which leads me to the 63 year old lady who is pregnant through IVF!! She has a 26 year old daughter, a 22 year old son so it is not like she has the need to experience childbirth. She is a child psychologist (which gives pause for thought), she looks fantastic for 63, she is very healthy, she and her new 61 year old husband are successful professionals ... and in twenty years's she will be 83? Old age is a very rapid process - it takes much longer to grow up than it does to get old. There is a very logical reason that women are programmed to stop having babies at a certain point so why mess with "Mother Nature"? This 63 year old woman has certainly passed her "best before" date and is heading for her "warrant expiry" date! You would think with her professional experience and years of wisdom she would know that this is not in the best interest of the child and purely selfish on her part. I believe when you make a the decision to have a child you should at least have a reasonable expectation of living long enough to raise that child.
Monday, May 01, 2006
Having had to opt for laminate countertops for our kitchen in lieu of the granite which I love so much our backdoor neighbour just bought a large steel outdoor table with would you believe a beautiful granite top which I will see each and every day - I am turning green with envy!!!